DAY 6

6 PLACES I WANNA GO.

1. BAGUIO. I don't like sunny days.

2. PLACES WHERE AURORA (astronomy) can be seen. :D

3. PARIS. I want to see Eiffel Tower.

4. BALI, INDONESIA. I just wanted to see Bali Island.

5. CHINA. The great wall. :))

6. SAUDI ARABIA. The Mecca.

DAY 5

5 FOODS.



ICE CREAM. I guess, everybody loves ice cream. hahaha


KWEK - KWEK. Even if I eat this everyday, I'll never get enough of this.


CHOCOLATES. Any kind will do. One of my stress relievers.


RICE. Can't call a meal a "Full Meal" without this.


ISAW. This is my all time favorite street food. *sorry parts*

DAY 4

4 BOOKS

FLOWERS IN THE ATTIC - V.C Andrews

This is a must read book. Thank you Russel Jane Lestojas for recommending this to me. :)


TWILIGHT SERIES - Stephanie Meyer

Thanks parts for lending me these books. :)


FIVE PEOPLE YOU MEET IN HEAVEN - Mitch Albom

I wonder who are those five people I'll meet halfway to heaven. haha


ABNKKBSNPLAK - Bob Ong

This is my favorite Filipino author. I really wonder how he looks like. :) (malamang tao xa)

DAY 3

3 FILMS.

A WALK TO REMEMBER. (2002)

I was really into tears after watching this. This is my all - time favorite movie. It's drama and romantic much but I think the feeling of being in love and hurt at the same time by merely hearing the title gives me goose bumps.

Landon: Our love is like the wind... I can't see it, but I sure can feel it.

Landon: Sorry, She never got her miracles.
Father of Jaime: She did, it was you.

"Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful." 

THE PARENT TRAP. (1998)


Got inspired after watching this. I mean, Annie and Hallie were soo cute. haha The plot was really, not the typical twin stories. The summer camp's soo good they got to know each other. How I wish there is also something like that here in the Philippines.


"I have a brilliant beyond brilliant idea!"


"Take your Pick."


"T-H-E-M. Them. Get the picture?" *hahaha! this one is sooo funny.*


"The "f" word."


*And the soundtracks were superb fine!* (There She Goes, Here comes the sun and Happy Club)

THE RING. (2002)

This movie is soo yesterday but I don't know. I still love this. I think  I watched it like 4 times. haha But I have no intention of watching it for the fifth time. Nowadays, horror movies are not that appealing to me. Don't know. Maybe I'm just saving myself from terror and all. haha Got insomnia for 2 days because of this movie actually. :) 

*Can't remember any lines because all I do is just SCREEEAAAAAMMM! 

These are my personal preferences in three different genres! how was that? hahaha

DAY 2

2 SONGS.

I'll Never Go.

You would always ask me
Those words i say
And telling me what it means to me

Every single day
You always act this way
For how many times i told you
I love you
For this is all i know

Come to me and hold me
And you will see
The love i give
For you still hold the key

Every single day
You always act this way
For how many times i told you
I love you
For this is all i know

Chorus:
I'll never go far away from you
Even the sky will tell you
That i need you so
For this is all i know
I'll never go far away from you

Come to me and hold me
And you will see
The love i give
For you still hold the key

Every single day
You always act this way
For how many times i told you
I love you
For this is all i know

If I'm not In Love With You

If I'm not in love with you
What is this I'm going through, tonight
And if my heart is lying then
What should I believe in
Why do I go crazy
Every time I think about you baby
Why else do I want you like I do
If I'm not in love with you

And if I don't need your touch
Why do I miss you so much, tonight
If it's just infatuation then
Why is my heart achin'
To hold you forever
Give a part of me I thought I'd never
Give again to someone I could lose
If I'm not in love with you

Oh why in every fantasy
Do I feel your arms embracing me
Lovers lost in sweet desire
Oh why in dreams do I surrender
Like a little baby
Someone help explain this feeling
Someone tell me

If I'm not in love with you
What is this I'm going through, tonight
And if my heart is lying then
What should I believe in
Why do I go crazy
Every time I think about you baby
Why else do I want you like I, I do
If I'm not in love with you

*I really wanted to post an audio here but sorry I don't know how. haha

These two are two of my favorites songs. These songs were soo heartfelt I could find sleep just listening to them.

REAL DAY 1

1 photo of you

This photo was captured by ate Anna :D This is one of my favorite photos of all times. Really. My face was soo funny I could die, and yes it's funny but I really don't find it ugly. Actually, it's cute. It's soo me. Big eyes, the moles, no face powder, no power smile, no pretensions, simply me. :)

DAY 1

Gone to blog hopping and fortunately saw this one. :)

Maybe I can manage the stress by this. :D

Day 1 will be posted ahead. <3

MY HEART JUST MELTED.

Oh! Can I ask every friend I have on facebook to please not to send me any private messages? I am waiting for something so important that having an unread message in my FB just waiting to be opened can cause my heart to just melt. </3

You should know by now.

What do you want? You're so insensitive, I'm gonna die. I can't understand you, really. It just so happened that for the first time in my life, I don't know what to say. I don't know how to say everything to you in a way you would understand.

You know the feeling of being tired of showing your emotions because you know that someone might just take it for granted? That's how I feel. You may not know it but I felt taken for granted. I am giving you my time and all the effort I could give just to make this relationship work. Damn you! But what are you doing? You're just letting that one day to passed by without even having a glimpse of how's my day?

I think I'm gonna hate you. If you're not yet ready to commit yourself to me, then why do you have to do that? TELL ME. I need your explanation. I would hear your side. I would let you go if you wanted to. I would not hold on to this. Yes. I did wait for you but I just forgot that you and I grew and became matured apart. I don't know if you are still that old best friend I used to know or that new someone I just have to accept.

TALK TO ME. There's no harm in telling me what you feel, for heaven's sake. It's hard to predict what you're thinking or feeling. What I just want is a constant communication. No more, No less.

And by that, you just ruined my weekend!

TRANSFERENCE :/

Lagot gud ka! Wala ka naga-sulti! Lagooooooooooooooot! </3
Sayang lang.

LOVING IS NOT OWNING :(

I think this is the saddest part of being in love. This is the saddest feeling when you know that even you love your partner so much there is still that part of him/her that can't be and will never be yours if he doesn't want to. For me, it's the TIME. Time is a very valuable thing that more often than not we, people tend to take for granted. The 'time' of the other person is very important that if she/he gives that to you, then you could have all the reason to tell the world that every inch of him is yours. 

My previous posts were somewhat like all are in due to my subjectivity. My mind could not just take it anymore I have to write. No,no,no. I needed to write. Yes, loving is not owning,  when I read this somewhere else my heart begun to accept something that's not endurable on my part. 

Maybe I am just too expecting a bed time story. Something everybody would love and I realize that being together now is way more beautiful than just to see you in my dreams. :'( Not literally together (because you are there and I am here, it's unfair!) but at least I know that half of you is mine.  Partly, half of you.

The most secure way to keep the love is to give it space and care to grow. Giving space is a not - so brilliant idea for me. I do believe that, two people can grow and mature together. It might be very hard for the two of us to keep track of each other but exerting a little bit effort would be one of the bestest thing to do. 

Don't worry, I would not let any bad vibes go in here. I would care for you, I would care for your temper as you do to mine. Happy 7th day tomorrow. <3 I would pray fervently for the strength of this relationship. I think this blog would be a lot of US. 

A WHOLE NEW WORLD WITH HIM :))

If I could just express how happy I am right now, I could write millions of words that everyone would be happy with but just for now the smile on my face would just be enough to give people an idea of how happy I am now that I have him. :)

I've been waiting for this for four years. That waiting made me happy, sad, cry, depressed and for once gave up. I don't know why this happened, really. There came to a point that I promise myself he will not have me back but here I am, soo happy with him I can't help to smile for no reason. I can't help to tell myself that he was one of the best birthday gifts ever. :) 

I may not tell him exactly what I wrote here or what I am tweeting in twitter but one thing's for sure I love him with all of me. This is one of the sweetest feeling and I want to savor the moment while it's here. This feeling i have is soo intense my heart could not bear it. Like Ivaine in the stardust telling Tristan that in exchange for her heart is Tristan's heart. 

"My heart... It feels like my chest can barely contain it. Like it's trying to escape because it doesn't belong to me any more. It belongs to you. And if you wanted it, I'd wish for nothing in exchange - no gifts. No goods. No demonstrations of devotion. Nothing but knowing you loved me too. Just your heart, in exchange for mine.

 " - Stardust (2007)

Just like Ivaine, I did not wish anything in return but his heart - just his heart. I know long time ago he did wish of my heart too and I think I gave it to him just before he decided to gave me up. Oooops! Nothing but good vibes here. :) I am happy, He's happy and I hope everybody's happy <3

My sydkik. I love you, like really. I don't want you/my happiness to slip away again so I decided to fully commit myself on this relationship and let it last so that I can hold your hand when we're old and thank God for being so generous to give me what I really want from the very start. <3

I may have my very own shortcomings or you'll get tired of me asking lots of favors to you but I know we can do this. :) We both deserve the best so we'll make the best of it. I love you and Miss na jud kaayo kaayo kaayo tika! Mwah! 

P.S.

Please drop by in my dreams tonight. Goodnight.

Maybe I am not.

This post will supposedly for next week but I can't get the ideas out of my head. So, I NEED to write it down like really. :)

Don't know how to start but let's put it this way.

I am not good in telling people how much they mean to me but when I do so I tend to sound corny. I am a smiling - faced snob, not a brat just snob. I can't persuade myself to believe in something unless I tell others that I believe. But me a dumper? 

I am not good in singing, I am bad at sports, Not really into something worthwhile but I guess I have this exceptional gift of sensing the feelings of others. Yes, I am oozing with sensitivity. I am so sensitive I managed to be assuming. 

My best friend told me yesternight that between us he is the most friendly. OKAY. I mean, MAYBE he knows how to nurture friendship as much as I do but that doesn't mean I am the dumper here. (Promise parts, no hard feelings about that, I just need this to make sure my ideas would be connected)

I have to air my side. I don't dumped friends. It's just maybe a long the way, I could not see them or feel them  that my mind forgets them. And it's not about pride thinking that I would get hurt when they bid their goodbyes so I'm trying to express my farewell first. I am a happy person, I tend to say Hi and Hello first, I can engaged myself into a conversation with a stranger but I do believe along the journey of getting to know each other and became friends there are some people who could really make you feel like "this will just be a  fleeting friendship or you are my friend, nothing more, nothing less" and that feelings give me the idea of "okey, I would consider that". So, that's it. My mind forgets them but surely when we meet again that passion I have for them will be relive.

I realized I just have 6 friends who's been really my TRUEST FRIEND of all time. When I say TRUEST that means even without seeing each other for a very very long time still they consider to share every little story of happiness and sadness of their lives just to make sure the connection is still there. And that connection, may it be simple or special, you just have to believe it for it to be TRUE. 

CAN'T WAIT.

          I really don't want to wait for you to fall for me. :'( Like Really. Don't have the courage to face the pain and hurt. I know those things will break me apart. I am young and I know the time is moving - moving so fast I cannot chase it. 

          I want you to know that I cannot handle the felling I have inside but been taught myself to understand that your feelings for her cannot be set aside. I don't want to wait for that day that you would tell me to be happy for you and her. that's ouch! you know?! As much as possible I don't want my feelings to be obsolete but it made me feel like I am deprived - that my feelings were being stepped on. It hurts more than that of being happy for you.  

          Feelings changed, I guess. Time will make me through this obscurity - no, I am just certain that this is not just a darkness that needs to be lighted but a chasm to be filled in. I never really wanted to create an issue over this matter. I am thinking of forgetting this stupid sentiment about you. How I wish I never got to know you :( (that's the saddest wish I had so far this year).

          Just a while ago I decided to forget the feelings, to indulge myself to something MORE better and enjoyable to get even with the pain you've given me but as I am trying to do so I am hurting myself even more. I should consider the fact that there will be no US that what lies ahead is just ME alone or Me and the one who got away or Me and the Mr. Guy Someplace else. 

            Certainly, I know you are one of those friends who's been compelled to visit my blog once in a while but you'll never know it's you. 

Drama much here. Just needed a shock absorber and this blog could be the best choice.  :-/

and one more thing I miss you. 

LAUGHTRIP :D

Always happy :D

Happy words I've heard this day:

>I'm Hungry
>Si KAMID maam! haha
>HINDI - Alaba
>You know - Imarga
>Money Wise
>Kaon na pud ka na way hagad - hagad
>Buckle's belt that looks like ZUMA.
>He's just soo cute. May pinaghuhugutan pala lahat.
>God of likes
> Palace Guard
>Halaka oi
>Oh diba? kataas sa akong buhok? haha
>Unsa to atong nakit-an? Nagsakit na gud akong ulo! :D

Sa makarelate lang :)) I wish of more laughtrip to come!

PEOPLE CHANGE.

HINANAKIT PART 1


KUNG ALAM MO LANG...

Gusto kita - gustong gusto kita.
Kung may isang bagay akong ayaw mawala ikaw yun.
Kung may hihilingin akong maging akin, ikaw yun.
Kung may gusto man akong magbago, yun ay ang pagtingin mo para sa akin.


EH KASO...

Hindi mo ako gusto.
Parang gusto mo akong mawala.
Wala kang ibang ginusto kundi maging sayo SIYA.
At kung may gusto kang magbago siguro yon ang nararamdaman ko.


PERO...

Kahit na kelan di mo malalaman na gusto kita.
Minsan ko lang pinangarap na maging TAYO.


NGAYON...

I'll see to it that I'm strong enough and you can't disturb my peace of mind.
I never dreamed to be your girlfriend because you are soo mean :-/
      

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Welcome 2011!

         2010 was a year of heartbreak, drama, laughter, finding friends but never finding the right man :( I am still single but not that VERY HAPPY haha. Like I wanted to meet my "Jyun Pyo" na.

         According to my horoscope ( I never really believed on this, but just for the sake of having an introductory sentence of this paragraph I would used this) I will be lucky on my career and family but these stars never show any sign of luck in love life. Like seriously. So for that, I will work out my love life until it will land into my palms like a tamed butterfly. Hahaha! But of course, I'll never chase it. Sometimes you have to give up that hard - to- get attitude and take risks for love to take you in a magic carpet ride.

          This year i want it to be nearly perfect. I claim it, I'll pass the board exam and I will be in the list of graduates for 2011. 

         I'm not fond of having new year's resolution but for a change this year, I wanted to sleep and wake up early, no bad words allowed, more time for praying and let go of those things that hurt me. In short, I'LL BE MORE BETTER. NEVER SAY NEVER :D

Who's She and Who's Xej?

          An old friend texted me on New Year's Eve and he used my high school moniker She. I felt awkward. Didn't know why. So, I had a deep thought of who's She and Who's Xej.

         She was soo high school. She didn't had her freedom to express herself. She had aways been intimidated, always been judged, was not allowed to commit mistakes but she was never been/slash/almost perfect. She just felt beautiful once or twice, She often decides for herself, She doesn't know how to get even with someone, She badly wants roses, poems and balloons. She had  very little self-confidence. She was always been nagged, misinterpret by others but because of that I do believe that She was always been that famous. She was dreamy - ALWAYS.  She was a lola's girl. She loves to write anything like really. She always dreamed to be a journalist or anything that writes. Maybe to sum it all up, She was always looking for something good and if ever she finds one she rejoices like it was the good-iest of all things. 

          The better version of She is today's what they called Xej. Xej is free, believes in the essence of Individualism and Identity. Xej feels beautiful almost everyday. Was once intimidated but she overcome it and now living a bitter - free life. Xej is still judged but she realized that the best way to get even with someone is to let them know they are sooo wrong from the very start that they could DIE. haha Xej is living independently. Xej knows the value of time - that chance of telling those people around her how much she loves them. Xej doesn't needs roses, poems and balloons to be happy because being with her family and friends is more than enough. Xej is not famous but being loved by anyone, I guess. :)) 

          She and Xej will always be a part of Shejerasadze. She's experiences will always be a big help to Xej for her to be what she is right now. - A SMILING, CONTENTED, LOVED, FREE  AND NOT - SO - FAMOUS YOUNG GIRL WITH SOO MUCH TO SHOW IN THE NEAR OR DISTANT FUTURE. :D